Alarm Clocks and Other Annoying Devices
Today as I was rushing for my train in bike shoes (which as some of may know have ZERO flexibility in the sole) I realized why sane people don't run in bike shoes. I completed a 700m dash from the station to my apartment (to pick up my forgotten keys) and back to the station in slightly over 3minutes. I got on the train, and I peeled off layers of clothes that I had been wearing to protect me from the cold. I sat down on the train without realizing that I had chosen to sit across from my arch enemy!
Yes, evil takes the same train to work almost everyday as I do. She gets off one stop after I get on, but 9 out of 10 times she’ll put me in a bad mood to start off my morning. Today was no exception.
This annoying individual has decided that in case she falls asleep on the train she should set her cell phone alarm to make sure she doesn’t miss her stop. The alarm rings without fail 15 seconds after I get on the train every [bad word] morning! It’s not just any alarm, but the alarm with the exact same ring tone as my alarm. It's the one that gets me out of bed every morning at 620am and forces me into the drugly routine of dressing, eating, and preparing for the onslaught of poorly spoken English that comes with each day. That most hated of hated noises belongs to that of the devil himself, or herself as it seems to be.
I have dreamed of throwing her off the train, or using one of those 5 ton hammers from a Roadrunner cartoon to smash the phone to oblivion. Thinking about it, I guess the most obvious solution would be to change my alarm to a different ring tone. Like that’s going to happen. This is a matter of pride! Don't give in to EVIL! Besides, it's a popular ring tone so I know at least a few others must be thinking 5 ton hammers too!
posted by Graham @ 2:13 AM
6 Comments:
Easy solution:
Step 1) Set your phone to go off 10 seconds before hers and crank the volume way up.
Step 2) If step 1 is not sufficient then consider bringing a boom-box with you to amplify the volume.
rugged
PS. If possible, videotape reaction and post here.
That'd be sweet! I'm afraid this blog is sadly lacking in video clips of crazy people :)
It might also be fun to bring a squirt gun along. There's nothing more fun that watching a crazy person wake up trying to figure out why their face is wet!
Dude, I'm jealous. I want an arch enemy!
Dude, you arch enemy is out there waiting for you!
Dude 2, I'll get on the video clips ASAP
Dude 3, SWEET idea on the 10 seconds earlier alarm.
G Dawg,
Just go out and buy her a headset for her phone. Give it to her on Single's Day and tell her, "Anyone who is so ridiculously unaware of her impact upon others definitely must be single. So I figured today would be a good day to give you a clue. Please use this."
That way, you end up looking actually SOOOO NICE because you gave her a gift. But then you also get her to shut the hell up. AND you end up looking *so nice* which is the best way to piss of an arch enemy.
suz... Many an arch enemy you must have had perhaps?
I actually took rugged up on his suggestion of videotape. I used my phone camera. But after 3 days of pointing a phone camera in her direction everymorning... it was like garlic to a vampire. She's all self conscious now and never sleeps. She turns it off within less than a second. At last I have peace!
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